School shooter? I’m too fucking busy to be a school shooter!

Ok I’m not vulgar by nature. I promise. Hahaha. The title is actually Quote #515 from this website!

Gaaaahhh. IB is eating my year 2008 really really fast. IB’s like this discombobulating Pac-Man dude in this time labyrinth of mine, voraciously eating up all the seconds, minutes, days, weeks and months. And I’m really getting nervous. My heart palpitates everytime I remember my unfinished English essay which has been collecting dust under my study table. My brain freezes everytime I see a French word in the internet. There have been occasions where I suddenly hear a stream of undecipherable French words inside my head, as if someone is talking to me in French. Creepy. And I haven’t revised my French yet. It seems that I have forgotten almost all the French stuff I’ve learnt for the past five months. And I can’t decide on what proposal to submit to Monsieur Heusdens in order to improve our French lessons every Mondays and Tuesdays. Maybe he has realised that the lessons have stagnated and have become quite boring at times. I even caught myself on the verge of drooling over my foolscap paper at one time. Yuck!! Good thing Amanda is such a busybody.

And the title of this blog entry does not really fit into my current life; I have been incessantly stoning inside the house; in fact, I have been sleeping 12-13 hours a day. You can actually imagine that if I counted the number of days that I have been here in the Philippines, I have spent half of that duration sleeping, let alone those moments when the sun is up and shining brightly, and there I am sitting by the window daydreaming about weird stuff. Talk about being a lazy bum in the house.

Not like the other schoolmates of mine who have been lavishly spending their holidays in faraway places around the world, like the USA, Japan, Spain, Iceland, Mongolia, Hong Kong, Malaysia (well HK and M’sia are not really considered far away). Argh, I really wish I could have a holiday getaway to some ulu place!! Me and me alone.

I’ve been wanting – dying – to visit some places in the world, places that people usually hardly know or, in case they know a lot, hardly give a shit about it. There’s one place which calls itself Ushuaia. Sounds pretty gay, actually, *Ushuaia* but I actually discovered this name when I was watching Discovery Channel a few years back. It was a given title of a show, if I’m not mistaken, and I never knew that it’s also a name of a town smacked right the tip of South America, until I have learnt how to search stuff in the Internet in Primary six.

Ushuaia is actually the sothernmost town in the world, the capital of Tierra del Fuego Province in Argentina. If you ask me, I think it would really be interesting to find out how it feels to live in the “southernmost town”. Singapore actually brags one of its microscopic Sentosa islands as the southernmost point in continental Asia, when in fact, it’s merely connected to mainland Sentosa by a little bridge; Sentosa to mainland Singapore by that Sentosa bridge (you can count the cable car and the monorail as well); mainland Singapore to mainland Asia by the Causeway. Hmph. So if I connect a bridge from that little island in Sentosa to Batam, then Batam would be the southernmost point in continental Asia. -.-

You must be kidding me.

There’s another interesting place in the world which sometimes appears in my dreams. Mongolia.

I don’t know. After watching some documentaries about this country, I just felt that this should be worth visiting. With a landlocked area of about 1.6 million sq. km., there’s plenty of land to explore. With a population density of two people per sq. km, there’s a lot of room for yourself to do some tomfoolery around. Imagine, if the Mongolian population would actually be evenly distributed, a family of six would occupy three square kilometers of Mongolia and they can have it all to themselves. Cool. And I want to experience how it feels to be a nomad in the rural areas of Mongolia. I think it’s a wonderful diversion from the stagnant and busy urban life in the Philippines and in Singapore.

Of course, if you ask the nationalistic fragment of my existence, I would want to go in an all-out expedition in Palawan, Philippines.

Regraded by renowned underwater explorer Jacques Cousteau as the most beautiful place he had ever explored. Oooh.. It think it’s actually true! Although I haven’t been there yet. It is home to one of the world’s most diverse flora and fauna, breathtaking mountains and rain forests, the world’s longest subterranean river, and some of the best beaches in the world, scattered in this vast expanse of 1768 islands that comprise the entire province.

Okay, this would be the last one, since I believe this entry’s going really boring.

I want to go to Spain.

I want to see how much this country has progressed after it has left this impoverished country of mine with a SPAIN without the S.

Hahaha this entry seemed like a travel blog.

Inday and her briefcase no. 4

Eto na si Inday sa kanyang first TV appearance
-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+
Kris: Magandang gabi mga kapamilya, sa gameshow na ito importante ang sagot sa nag-iisang katanungang Deal or no Deal. Ang ating player ngayong gabi ay walang iba kundi ang fastest-rising household services manager na si Inday!

[umentra si Inday at nagpalakpakan ang mga tao]

Kris: Ok Inday, choose a briefcase.

Inday: Kris, I would opt for case #4 please.

Kris: Briefcase # 4… si Sharmel. Inday, matanong ko lang, how did you come up with the number 4?

Inday: Oh, do you really want to know Kris?

Kris: Oo naman. I’m sure kaya ko naman maintindihan yung sasabihin mo eh.

Inday: The number 4 was acquired based on a probability distribution function that involves integrating up to an area greater than or equal to that random number which should be generated between 0 and 1 for proper distributions.

Kris: Syet. tanong tanong pa kasi eh.

—————————————
Kris: Ok Inday, choose 6 briefcases to open.

Inday: I would opt for 7, 24, 12, 2, 15 and 20.

Kris: Wait lang Inday, usually isa isa lang ang pagbubukas natin ng case…

Inday: Why is that? As if I can change the outcome if we’re to open a case each time I blurt out a number as opposed to opening each case immediately one after the other right?

Kris: Hayyy…babaguhin pa talaga mechanics (bulong sa sarili).

Kris: Anwyay, di bale na lang nga… tuloy tayo. Number 7 . Natalie buksan na!!
[Yung audience sumisigaw ng LOWER!! LOWER!!!]

Kris: Teka lang, bago natin buksan… Inday, usually ang mga contestants naten ay sumisigaw ng “LOWER” every time magbubukas ng case.

Inday : Kris, I guess that’s not the way I was taught in grade school. You see, I was taught that we should only use the comparative form of the word or add “ER” to the adjective if we are comparing two things. And since it is only the first briefcase that we are going to open, we have nothing to compare it to. Am I right?
[natahimik ang audience at napaisip]

Kris: Oo nga no!
————————————-
Kris: Sige Natalie, Buksan mo na.

[Ang laman ng briefcase 7 ay Piso… Palakpakan ang mga tao]

Kris: Good start! Ano yung next case mo ulit?

Inday: Case number 24 please.

Kris: Chloe… buksan na…

[Audience sumisigaw ulit ng LOWER!! LOWER!!]

Kris: Wait lang guys, Inday may nabuksan ng case baket di ka pa rin sumisigaw ng “Lower”?

Inday: Oh my goodness Kris, how long have you been doing this? Have you ever encountered a value that is lower than a peso in this game? Tell me, is there any value left lower than the one we just opened? Sheesh.
[Napaisip ulit ang audience at natahimik]

Kris: Aarrgghh!!!! Chloe buksan na lang nga, pati na rin yung 12, 2, 15 and 20 buksan na rin para matapos na. [naiirita na]
[At sunod sunod na ngang nabukas ang mga case ni Inday]
[nag-ring ang phone]

Inday: Ahh Kris, to save more time can you tell Banker that I’m not interested in his first offer. In the history of this game of chance, I have yet t o see someone accept a first offer from the banker. It’s quite pathetic and pretentious for contestants to pause and look around the audience as if asking for advice before ultimately rejecting the first offer. I mean come on, isn’t that a waste of airtime?

Banker: Potahhh!!! [narinig sa set kahit sarado ang kwarto ni banker]
- Ito ang unang pagkakataon na marinig ng mga audience ang boses ni banker sa Deal or no Deal.
—————————
Kris: Ok Inday, mukhang kelangan na natin ng tulong sa mga friends mo… sino ba yung bigotilyong lalaki na naka-polo? Ano name nya?
Inday: Ahh, that’s my master Mr. Montemayor.

Kris: Ahhh sya pala yun, how cute naman pala eh. Sige sir, give us a number.

Mr. Montemayor: Hi Kris, good evening. I’m a fan. I choose number 22 please.

Kris: Ano Inday ok ba yung number 22?

Inday: Whatever, we shouldn’t bite the hand that feeds us anyway. Go ahead.

Kris: [taray naman] Sofie, buksan na!
[ang laman ng briefcase 22 ay 5,000]

Kris: Good job! Sino naman yung gwapong lalake na naka jumper na katabi ni Mr. Montemayor? What’s his name?

Inday: Ahh, that’s my on again off again boyfriend, Dodong the gardener.

Kris: Ooohh, sya pala yun. Ok Dodong, give us a number!

Dodong: Hi babes, I choose briefcase 9 if it’s ok with you. If not, it’s ok with me as long as it’s ok with you.

Kris: Ano raw? Inday, number 9 daw ok say0?

Inday: Yes Kris, it’s fine with me.

Kris: Wow ang bait pag kay Dodong. Ederlyn… buksan na!!
…nanlaki ang mga mata ni Inday at hindi sya makapaniwala. Natahimik at mukhang kakapusin sya ng hininga…

Inday: YOU!!! How dare you invade my moment!
[nagulat si Kris at ang mga audience sa reaksyon ni Inday. Nagpatawag si Kris ng commercial break at nagpakuha ng tubig para kay Inday.]
—————————-
Ederlyn: Pinapangako ko, Inday… pagbukas luluhod ang mga tala! hahahahaha!
Inday: What? Can you speak up? What are you mumbling up there. Can somebody give her a microphone please?

Kris: Ano ba!! Tama na nga ang drama ninyo, Ederlyn buksan mo na ang case at umexit ka na kung ayaw mong mapalitan! (naiirita na si Kris)
Dali-daling binuksan ni Ederlyn ang briefcase at ang laman ay… P3,000,000.
Nanghinayang ang mga audience… Ang mga natirang values ay 250, 1K, 20K, 50K, and 500K.

Inday: NooOoo…. (sabay tingin kay Dodong at napapaluha), how could you…
Dodong: I’m so sorry Inday, please forgive me.

Kris: Hayyy, drama again. Ang offer ni banker sa pagbabalik ng Kapamilya, Deal.. or No Deal!
[pagtapos ng commercial break… mukhang composed na ulit si Inday]

Kris: Inday, are you okay? Ang offer ni banker ay 99 thousand pesos . ‘Sing rami siguro ng pilipinong pinadugo mo na ilong. Is it a Deal or No Deal?
Tahimik lang si Inday tilang may kinocompute sa ulo habang ang mga audience ay nagsisigawan ng “No Deal”, ang iba naman ay “Deal”.

Kris: Wait lang, kung mapapansin ninyo we have only have 5 cases left, and among those 5, apat doon ay mas maliit na value…

Inday: Kris, do you mind? Can I do my own thinking?
Natameme si Kris, pati ang audience ay natahimik.

Kris: Taray to the max! (pabulong sa sarili)

Inday: Ok, I’m ready. Upon looking at the reality of the situation, 80% of the cases left have at least 49K less than the banker’s offer. The only way I can do better than what is offered is that if my case contains the 500k or I’d get to open one of the four lower values. But I have to keep in mind that there’s only 20% probability that this would happen. I have to take note, however, that the banker’s offer is roughly around 15% lower than the offer I expected based on the arithmetic mean of the values left.

Kris: Lorddd… panaginip ba ‘to? Ayokonaaa….
Inday: Accepting a deal for less than the mean should generally be regarded as a weak decision so I would say, NO DEAL!
———————–
Limang briefcase na lang ang natitira at kasama na doon ang case ni Inday…

Kris: My God, nakaka-stress itong episode na ito ha. Baka dumugo na rin ang ilong ko sa’yo Inday. Sige Inday, go ahead and choose 1 briefcase!
Inday: Ok Kris, I choose briefcase #5 please?

Kris: Briefcase #5! Mimi bago mo buksan yan I would first like to thank Figliarina by Schubizz for my sandals, Bambi Fuentes for my hair and make-up and Pepsi Herrera for my gown tonight.

Kris: Ok Mimi, buk…
Inday: Ahh Kris, can I also take time to thank a few people? I mean, I did save us a few minutes of airtime right?

Kris: ( “kapal naman talaga ng mukha”…bulong sa sarili ) Sige, ok lang go ahead. (naka-smile pa rin)

Inday : Thanks! Yes, I would like to thank Frank Provost for my hair and make-up, Jimmy Choo for my sandals and my dear friend Oscar dela Renta for my gown tonight.
BLAG!! Tinumba ni Kris ang podium at nagwalk-out. Hindi na natapos ang show kaya’t binigyan na lang ni Banker si Inday ng kalahating milyon para sa kanyang oras.

Inday : Oh, and thanks to the people of Cartier for sending me these nice earrings for tonight!
[Ito ang isa sa mga un-aired episode ng Kapamilya, Deal or No Deal]