rowland.

Hi.

Recently turned 19, I am an International Baccalaureate slave, a Roman Catholic, now of legal age to vote, to drink alcohol, to drive, to marry, to smoke, and to f*** around. I am manufactured in the Philippines but currently utilized in Singapore. Most people in the Philippines call me Row, as a result of a passed down genetic trait that triggers laziness. Actually, my nickname is Anju, which I am really really not so fond of. But I am fortunate enough not to suffer from the ubiquitous Filipino frenzy of naming nicknames with letter ‘h’s sandwiched between other letters, e.g. as Jhong, Jhing, Bhong, or Bhing, and the usual repetition of the same syllables - usually created by the whole extended family giggling in delight as one utters his or her baby cry while shitting unconsciously and secretively on the lampin, inside the duyan – resulting in stuttering names like Ton-ton, Ping-Ping, Bam-bam, Ging-ging and Don-don. *sniggers*

I am an alumnus of the following schools. A kindergarten alumnus of the Colegio de la Immaculada Concepcion in Mandaue City, Cebu, an elementary alumnus of the Notre Dame of Dadiangas College Integrated Basic Education Department, a high school alumnus of the General Santos City SPED Integrated School in, obviously, General Santos City, and a secondary school “Old Boy”  of St. Joseph’s Institution (SJI) in Singapore. Old Boy. Gah. I noticed Philippine schools love to be called with loooooong names.

I grew up to be a very intelligent kid. My encyclopedias and dictionaries were part of my daily diet. As a result, I have never experienced what it feels to be a fat dude. Hallelujah. I thought I would become a nerd when I grow up. I think my parents thought so, too. But luckily, I didn’t. As I grew up I became more intelligent, which was natural, but I was losing my consistency in focusing on my studies, which I believe is ever more important than big brains alone. Like any other kid my age, I got addicted to Pokemon playing cards, toy guns, aeroplanes, Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers, and at one time in Primary 3 I got addicted to chinese garter which I think was really really gay, then Cartoon Network, Nickelodeon, and at the advent of the insidious PlayStation bonanza, that black box with the cathode ray oscilloscope became the altar of a second religion which I so devotedly practiced.

But it’s all changed now. I think I’m a good boy now. Seriously. Bleh. I don’t even watch  TV shows nowadays. I don’t even play games anymore. I’m just into blogging and facebooking most of the time.

I am not nationalistic. But I do memorize the Pambansang Awit, the Preamble, the Panunumpa ng Katapatan sa Watawat ng Pilipinas, the Panatang Makabayan, and a little bit of Otso-otso and Hello Garci lyrics. And yeah, I am crazy about karaoke, like any other typical Filipino. However, my Filipino (Tagalog) sucks. I can speak fluently, but I can’t write for nuts. It is a terrible ordeal for me to translate English sentences to Tagalog. The lack of my vocabulary and my verbosity in Tagalog prohibits me from posting more entries using my native tongue. Actually, I can speak two other dialects, Ilonggo and Bisaya. They are very widely-spoken in the central and southern parts of the Philippines, which results in my frequent bashing of the Philippine government and its constitution, on why these dialects were never considered to be officiated alongside Tagalog. And yeah, I totally hate the government. I can’t wait for the day when Ate Glo steps down in 2010. That would be like finally plucking out a needle stuck on your ass since 2001.

People here in Singapore think I come from an affluent, posh, royal family – who wouldn’t, when you have a surname called IMPERIAL – but, fortunately, I am a simple probinsyano who hails from a family that earns no more than my annual school fees in SJI International. This is one tangible evidence that God is so good. I am from a simple middle-class family but I’m studying in a uber-rich kid’s school. Whheeeeeeeeeeee. Not many people get the chance to get these kinds of opportunities. I sit in a classroom populated with human beings who eat in Crystal Jade or some other posh restaurant on an ordinary hot day, who drive in these really mouth-watering BMWs and Mercedes Benzes and Porsches, you name it, who travel around the world as if air travel was just a traditional tricycle ride to the palengke. That’s why I study hard and study more. The school’s paying me millions of pesos to study. d:

I am circumcized, I currently have no girlfriend and I would like to have one after I finish the IB, French Ab Initio is fun but I think I really suck at it, I hate spicy foods, I like green, orange and red,  I do not support abortion and divorce but I think using contraceptives is okay, it was my first dream to become a doctor, I want to have five beautiful and handsome and healthy children and a good wife, my favourite movie is The Dark Knight, I like singing, dancing, and anything creative, I love durian more than any other fruit in the world, I like HL economics very much, and I like to lick cookies and cream ice cream, sip hot coffee, and suck plenty of seafood shells. Yup, that’s about it.

Fin

*********