Painted joys, hidden sorrows.

Why were there no tears?

There were ear-to-ear smiles on everyone’s faces. The joys and laughters reverberated through the corridors and inside the classrooms as if it was actually the first day of school. There were jokes. There were people who attempted to defy school rules by making impromptu pranks here and there, albeit executed with extreme care and subtlety, as if they were administering a last-resort placebo drug on a patient suffering from an impossible disease. Everything seemed so happy. Everything seemed so ordinary.

But it is, of course, a painted facade for everyone to see. While it was a fact that nobody within the confines of the school campus expressed grief through the shedding of a tear or two,  everyone knew very well that those smiles, those laughters, those jokes, were all nothing but lies.

Wrapping up november.

I finally spilled it.

Hopefully no one else will find out the mess I’ve made myself.

Because it is not, and it will never be.

But… even if it is, which sane person would want to continue feeling this retarded feeling?

Anyway, I’m not emo. I’m just reflecting on something. Screw it! argh!

****

But don’t get me wrong!

I’m not sad. Because this month has just been awesome for me.

Sound of Music. XES. Group 4 Project. French Idol. IB assessments. Awarding. And everything else. There was so much to sacrifice on my part, but in return, God has returned all the blood and sweat with countless blessings.

There’s too many people to thank, that I couldn’t mention anyone because I am afraid of leaving out people. So I’m not going to mention any person!!! OK!!! HAHA

Unfortunately, I am too lazy to reflect on the things that happened this month. But no one should complain because anyone who knows that I exist in school should know that I have been totally drained out from all the activities which I never foresaw clashing together all in the same week. Haha ok that sounded really mean. But they’re all in my head. Memories that will linger for many many years, unnecessary to be written down in words because at the first place, words themselves are unable to express the profound sense of gratitude welling up deep inside me. To all the compliments and commendations I’ve received, I really cherish every single one of them. Thank you, thank you, thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

To my friends, you have been really awesome. You have always made my day. You invisibly pull the ends of my mouth and make me smile. In the classrooms, in the corridors, in the clean toilets, dirty toilets, in the  microscopic canteen, up the slope, down the slope, in the grade 11-12 centre which we are going to miss forever. Your jovial disposition makes me spastic. Your words of encouragement are like energy boosters. Your words of advice should be published as books and sold to problematic people like me, because I think they’re way better than those self-help books you normally find in boring bookshops. Your jokes tickle my every nerve in my body. Your camwhorings are addictive. Your tears are like daggers that pierce through my heart. Your friendship warms the soul. I love every single moment with you guys. And yeah, the holidays are here. It’s been a year, and that painfully reminds us that we have only a year left together. It’s dumbfounding to know how fast the earth revolves around the sun when you’re with the awesomest people in the world. I wish time was slower. We could all migrate to Pluto and spice up that  uninhabitable, cold, barren pebble in outer space. I’m going to miss you all for one month.

And to my friends and family in the Philippines, I’m coming home. And I can’t wait to see you again.

Stole some photos on facebook… et voila.